Murder in the Mix Box Set Read online

  A laugh bubbles through me as I thread my arm through his. All of those past escapades were strictly in the name of our investigations, and it’s clear Everett enjoyed each tantalizing adventure.

  “I saw the guest list, and Maureen will be here tonight,” I whisper. “I think I should have a girl-to-girl chat with her. Who knows? Maybe it will lead us to the most lascivious place on the planet yet.”

  “Here’s hoping.”

  We turn to head for the grand room and bump into another couple heading in the opposite direction, Noah and his blonde bombshell of a wife, Britney. Her long hair waterfalls over one eye, giving her that ultra-sultry appeal, and she’s donned a tight-fitting black gown that looks as if she were dipped in paint. Everything about her screams Jessica Rabbit. It’s not a shocker he’s here with her. I bet they’ve mended fences and are about to celebrate the fact their family is finally back together, just the way it should be.

  Britney nods to the two of us. “We were just headed to dinner in the main dining room. Please extend our congratulations to your sister. I hope you like the way I set up the tables. I’ve always had a knack for interior design.” She threads her arm through Noah’s, and he stalls. His gaze is still set to mine with an earnest sadness clouding his eyes.

  “We’re discussing the details of our divorce,” he offers.

  “Have fun with that.” I pull Everett into the grand room and don’t look back. A part of me demands to believe Noah, and yet a part of me insists that Britney was all dolled up for a night on the town with her husband. Either way, I don’t want to upset myself over it.

  Dinner goes off without a hitch. Each table is strewn with the perfect arrangement of roses set in tall vases with sparkling crystals hanging from the stems like trapping a star. It looks magical, and normally, it would bring me an insane amount of joy, but just knowing Noah’s wife dug her Foxy claws into each arrangement makes me like them less. I guess I’m petty that way.

  After dinner, the music takes a turn for the romantic. Couples migrate to the dance floor, and soon enough Everett nods me over into the thick of it. He lands his arms around my waist, and it feels like the most natural thing in the world.

  I tip my head to the side as I look up at this deity who chooses to roam the planet freely. “What do you think will become of us?”

  “Us as in you and me?” His brows hike in amusement.

  “I mean, I know you don’t do relationships—and I’ve never done that whole one-night stand thing.”

  “I’m not looking for a one-night stand. I like having you around, Lemon. If I wanted you in my bed, you’d be there.” He winces. “Voluntarily, of course.”

  A laugh gets trapped in my throat. “You think you’re that good?”

  “I am that good. It’s just a fact. Besides, I’m letting you lead the way. If you want something with me, I’m here. If you want Noah, he’s there.” He ticks his head to the exit. “I trust you’ll make the right decision.”

  I’m about to toss back a saucy retort when we spot Maureen by the refreshment table and Keelie right next to her.

  “I think the stars just aligned,” I say just as Greer squeezes herself between Everett and me.

  “I thought you’d never leave,” she sings, looking right into Everett’s eyes as if he could see her.

  “Greer’s back, and she wants a spin on the dance floor.”

  “Go on, Lemon. I’ll watch from here.”

  I take off and come upon my bestie, fully expecting a friendly hello.

  “How dare you!” Keelie all but spits nails in my face.

  I take a step back and Maureen shrugs my way as if she had no clue, and I wouldn’t expect her to, but I need to keep her engaged.

  “What did I do this time?” I shake my head at Maureen as if this were a reoccurring thing between Keelie and me.

  “You let your crazy sister steal my fiancé. Word on the street is they’re dating. And she brought him here tonight to flaunt in my face! Can you believe it?”

  “This is about Hook? The fiancé you dumped? I thought you said you were both free to date other people?”

  “Yes, but not Meg. They had a thing for each other way back when. In no way do I want Hook to find his happily ever after with somebody else.”

  “Okay, but it doesn’t make sense. If you want him for yourself, you should make it exclusive.”

  “Please,” Keelie seethes as she steps in close. “You of all people should understand how an open relationship works. I was taking a page out of your playbook!”

  “Keelie! I’ve never seen you so mad. And I’m not in an open relationship. I can assure you of that.”

  “Then are you and Everett exclusive? Or are you just having a good time? Because either way, I’m sure it still hurts to see Noah parading around Honey Hollow with that new wife of his.”

  I shoot Maureen an uneasy glance. “Noah’s wife is not new. She was in the picture long before I was, and I wasn’t thrilled being the other woman.” My God, Keelie is a genius! Maureen must totally empathize with me right now. I’m going to have to buy Keelie dinner for this brilliant segue.

  “Whatever, Lottie. Just tell your sister to stay away from my man.” She scoops up a couple of banana muffins and heads back to her table.

  Maureen leans in. The hair on the back of her neck actually looks as if it’s standing up from the horror, but most likely it’s just growing out that way.

  “That looked harsh.” She gives a knowing wink.

  “It was. And I meant what I said. I never set out to be the other woman.”

  A chuckle resonates deep in her chest. “None of us do, honey.”

  “You mean you’ve been in my shoes before?” I’m ready to milk this until the murdering cows come home.

  “Oh yeah. And quite recently, too. Things didn’t exactly end the way I wanted with my last relationship. He needed to move quite a distance, and I was afraid I’d never see him again. Our relationship was everything to me, but it turns out, it meant nothing to him. Just a few days before we”—she squints to the ceiling—“broke it off for good, I found out he wasn’t only cheating on his wife, he was cheating on me as well.” She rolls her eyes. “They’re all the same, honey. It wouldn’t surprise me at all if the married man you were involved with had a little extra something on the side—in addition to you. Cheats are notoriously insatiable. And don’t you buy any of that bull that you’re the only one for them—that they’re leaving their wife, that they’re just settling the details of their divorce. It’s all malarkey I tell you, malarkey!” she shouts it out as if it were a macabre cheer, and my stomach drops because she just described Noah to a T.

  “So, who was this other woman he was seeing? I mean, you’re beautiful and vivacious. What did he need with yet a third partner?” Honestly, I’m stymied by the fact Judge Shumaker had the stamina for one, let alone three women in his life.

  Maureen makes a face as if she might be sick. “She’s some twit who teaches suburban couples how to strip for one another.”

  I can’t help but roll my eyes toward Everett, only to find not one but three women dangling from him as if he were a jungle gym. Naomi, Lily, and Greer Giles each look as if they’re having the time of their life. The judge doesn’t look too bored by it either. But the more women the merrier. That’s par for the course for Everett.

  “Wait, I think I might have taken that class”—I snap my fingers as I employ the oldest trick in the book—“it’s out in Leeds, right?”

  She shakes her head as she takes a quick bite out of a walnut encrusted truffle. “Fallbrook. Real highbrow stuff. Works out of some yoga place called Reach for Tomorrow or some junk like that. The two of them met because she gives free ten-minute massages at the courthouse once a month. Our insurance covers it.” She sighs as she looks out longingly at all the happy couples embracing on the dance floor. “I guess I know now she was giving him a little more than a back rub.” She gives my arm a quick pat. “But you’re far too youn
g and beautiful to run around with a broken heart. Get out there and have some fun. I saw the way Judge Baxter was looking at you. Whoever manages to tame that beast will be one lucky girl. He’s kind, devoted, and honest to a fault. They don’t make ’em like that anymore. If anything, he’s worth having a whole lot of fun with, and rumor down at the courthouse has it, he is a ball of F-U-N. I say hit it if you can. What are you waiting for, hon? Another married man to come along?”

  Certainly not that.

  She takes off, and I help Lainey and Forest cut the cake. Meg gives a grand speech and brings the house down with tears of joy.

  Afterwards, I take Everett up on his offer for a nightcap, chamomile tea for me and a shot of whiskey for him, and just the scent inebriates me to dangerous levels.

  Everett and I talk about everything under the sun. We discover we really do have so much in common. And all the while in the back of my mind I wonder what his kisses would taste like—serious kisses, not the chaste pecks we’ve already exchanged in the name of our investigations. And yet Noah resonates like a gong in the background, one that I can’t seem to escape.

  “Try to keep your calendar free for tomorrow night.” The words come out far more seductively than I meant them to. “I’m ready to take our investigation to the very next level.”

  I left out the tidbit about the yoga instructor in Fallbrook, but I Googled the kinks out somewhere between cutting the cake and serving it up. It turns out, Cindy Mitchell has an opening at six thirty, and I quickly signed Lola and Evan up for the endeavor.

  Everett walks me to the door. His daunting frame looks every bit ready to make me his.

  “I’m always ready to take things to the next level, Lemon.” Everett exudes enough testosterone to do a hostile takeover of every last part of me, and strangely I think every last part of me is ready and willing.

  We say goodnight and I head home, noting the lights are still out at Noah’s place, his car missing from the driveway. I guess that means he’s having a nightcap of his own.

  Or maybe he and his wife are taking things to the next level themselves.

  Either way, my broken heart and I don’t want to know.

  Chapter 9

  Fallbrook is the epitome of suburban wealth gone rampant—at least on the upper end of town where mega mansions are sprinkled about the countryside like solid gold Krugerrands. Fallbrook also happens to be where Everett grew up and his mother and sister still reside. He actually took me to his sister, Meghan’s, dirty thirty a couple months back and fooled his entire family into believing we were engaged. It turns out, Everett has a bit of a dirty streak in him, too. But I think I already knew that.

  Greer pokes her head between the two front seats and moans as she looks out the windshield. “I love me some Fallbrook. That moron that was fleecing me for my clientele, Tiger, lives out here. Hey? Do you think we can pay him a visit? I’d like to do a little early trick-or-treating and give him a nice ripe pop on the bottom for cheating me out of my fair share of the take.”

  I quickly relay the conversation to Everett before I glance back at Greer.

  “First, let’s get one thing straight. You’re dead. It is really, really hard to pay dead people their fair share of anything other than respect. Second of all, if you give someone a pop on the bottom, it will most likely be me who gets hauled in for assault because of it. So I veto that bottom slapping option.”

  “I’m not up for assault charges either.” Everett lifts his hand off the wheel momentarily. “No stunts, Greer. I mean it.”

  “Ooh,” she squeals with delight. “I like a man who tells me what to do and how to do it.”

  “I’m not repeating that,” I say just as Everett’s navigational device announces we have arrived at our destination. The two of us look up at what appears to be a mundane medical building, a plain white box set on a plain boxy street. Everett parks out front, and we quickly make our way into the building, only to find a sign that leads the way upstairs reading This Way to Couples Bear All.

  Everett takes a breath. “They get right to the point, don’t they?”

  “I guess there’s no way around this.” I look up at the handsome stud I’ve dragged along on one too many risqué adventures. “You know, I’ve never asked you this, but why do you go along with all of my crazy schemes? You do realize you can say no.”

  “And let you find another man to take my place? Not on your life, Lemon.” He presses his hand into the small of my back as we head on up the stairs. “Not to mention, I’m pretty sure you’re about to strip for me.”

  “You are such a pig!” I laugh while taking up his hand and giving it a squeeze, and Greer glides right by us blowing him a kiss.

  “Honey”—she drips the word sultry into his ear—“lucky for you, I love bacon on everything.”

  “Lemon?” We get to the top of the stairs, and Everett pauses, taking up my other hand. His left brow hooks into his forehead, and he has that look on his face that suggests he’s about to get lucky—correction, I’m about to get lucky. “We can ditch the shirtless shuffle, and I can turn the car around taking us right back to my place.” He steps in close as he takes in the scent of my neck. The peppered scuff on his face brushes up against my cheek.

  “Everett!” I laugh, taking a step back and nearly falling down the stairs, and he yanks my body close to his. We do a little spin toward the hall, and I can’t help but giggle up a storm.

  He pulls back, his features stone-cold, those blue eyes sirening out at me like warning beacons. “Did you or did you not proposition me with bacon?”

  “What?” I inch my head back to get a better look at him. I shoot a quick glance to Greer Giles and her see-through body and suck in a quick breath. “Oh my God.”

  “Now that I think about it, Honey Hollow is a decent drive. I know of a great hotel right here in town with a five-star room service menu. And trust me, Lemon, you will work up one hell of an appetite.”

  My mouth falls open.

  “Yes!” Greer cries out with all the glee her incorporeal being can muster.

  “Yes?” Now it’s Everett who’s inching back. “Wait a minute. Your lips didn’t move when you said it, did they?”

  I shake my head in horror. “Oh no, no, no… You can hear her!” I dislodge myself from the hot-to-trot playboy and chase that poltergeist right through a wall. “Come back here! You listen to me, you little hussy. I’ve got a murder investigation to solve, and I don’t need any part of your body that is well past its expiration date piping up!”

  Greer pokes her face out of the baby blue plaster, and it just hangs there suspended without a body to go along with it. I’ll admit, it’s a bit unnerving, but there’s no backing down now.

  “How did he hear me? Why did he hear me? As much as I like flying, walking through walls, moving objects, once people can hear me, it takes away a bit of the magic.” She sucks in a huge breath and nearly vacuums me up in the process. Greer jumps out of the wall and latches onto my hands. “What if the next step is that they can see me? I’ll have my life back! There won’t be anything different between me and the next girl.”

  “With the expectation of the flying, walking through walls—and you forgot that your body has a unique quasi-invisible quality that no amount of cosmetics nor clothing is able to disguise.”

  “Ugh.” She makes a face. “And no matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to take off this dress. Can you imagine? I’ve already worn it once. I wouldn’t be caught dead in it again.”

  I roll my eyes and look to Everett. “Are you hearing this? We have a real comedian on our hands.”

  Everett takes a step forward and wraps his arm protectively around me just as a mass of couples stream into an opened set of double doors at the end of the hall.

  “No, I don’t hear anything,” he whispers hot into my ear, and my insides bisect with heat.

  Greer tips back her head dramatically, so much so it looks as if she just cracked her spine in half to do it. “Oh, t
hank God! I never thought I’d say this, but I like the anonymousness.”

  “Anonymity,” Everett instinctually corrects her before our eyes widen with horror. “I heard her again.”

  “You did?” I’m breathless, terrified at what this might mean. “My powers—” I hold my hands up in front of me and inspect them. “They must be increasing.”

  “Oh, please, that man has an inner alarm that goes off when there’s a wanton woman in the vicinity. Of course, he heard me. It’s his superpower that’s growing, honey, not yours.”

  I look to Everett and nod. “Did you hear that pithy remark? She said it was your superpowers that were growing, not mine.”

  He shakes his head just enough. The two of us are frozen with extreme caution, afraid to move, to breathe, in the event we’ll scare away whatever this is.

  He lifts a finger. “I think I might know the answer to this haunted riddle.” He takes up my hands again and nods.

  “Greer?” My voice shakes. “Say something to Essex.” It’s ironic the only time I’m allowed to invoke his formal moniker is when I’m speaking to or referring to his exes—not that Greer was technically one of them, but face it, she was well on her way.

  Greer shudders as if not looking forward to this extraterrestrial encounter of the material kind.

  “Essex, if you don’t take Lottie Lemon by the hair and kiss her all the way back to that fancy hotel room, I am going to grab ahold of the steering wheel and get you there myself.” She gives a cheeky wink my way. “I thought since I had the spotlight I’d make it saucy. You can thank me later.”

  Everett takes a quick breath, his gaze wandering in the direction of where Greer’s voice came from. “You heard the girl, Lemon. We’d better start smooching, or she might just cause a pile up on I-97.”

  A nervous laugh trickles through me. “It’s the hands. I must be some kind of a conduit.” I let go. “Do it again, Greer.”

  “Would the two of you get in there already and take off your clothes? You’re getting me hot and bothered, and I don’t have a horse in this raunchy race.”